The latest installment of a reoccurring feature of GuestWomb where my daughters Emma and Sara get together on a Facebook chat about the topic of the day. Today the teens share a few thoughts on the current state of affairs:

Emma
So now that Mom has only two months to go, I’m a little less weirded out by her pregnancy. Maybe it’s because soon it will be over or something. What about you?

Sara
i think shes transformed into a beautiful butterfly….with the baby in all…

Emma
sara seriously

Sara
hahaha she doesnt act pregneant, well except the excessive crying, she still shovels snow and takes a hammer to knock off tile for the bathroom to redone and such.

she reaaaally shouldnt do that

Emma
Yeah, putting extra stress on herself and the baby is probably not good. But what about now that she’s showing?

Sara
what about it?

Emma
well, the whole baby kicking thing is so freaky!! I never really thought about the baby so much as mom just going through the pregnancy, but now that you can actually feel it, it’s much more real.

Sara
agreed, i dont think of it as weird..

Emma
Why not?

Sara
i actually support her through this, and so at the beggining i thought this was another one of her little imaginations that would never go through, but its really happening and i dont even think of this as uncommon how bout you?

Emma
I still think it’s a little strange. I mean, I’ll say to my friends something about mom being pregnant, they say, “Congrats!” and then I tell them its not hers, and a lot of them dont get it.

Sara
a lot of people dont get it

i have to explain from Baby Mama (the movie)

Emma
haha same!


What’s in a name? A whole bunch.

When Mom and Dad (or Mom and Mom!) come up with that perfect monicker, they’re doing a lot more than simply honoring a favorite family member, friend or vacation locale. (Paris, anyone?). No, I maintain they’re setting cosmic events into motion and  influencing history. And quite possibly dooming him or her to a childhood full of torment and teasing. And maybe beyond childhood, too.

For instance, what if American icon John Wayne would have instead grown up with the name:

Marion Morrison.

(What? Really? Oh. Bad example)

This is the next in a series of suggested names for Michelle’s temporary body tenant, with possible life experiences and scenarios:

Name: Bobby Jo Precious

Sex: F

Childhood Highlights:
Fitted for her first tiara, age 6 months. Only child in neighborhood with a rhinestone studded baby blanket.

Learned to walk on catwalk constructed in family garage, age 13 months. Learned to walk in heels on catwalk, age 15 months.

Lost first baby teeth, age 5. First use of teeth whitener, age 5 years, 1 month. Mom cautioned by doctor to limit child to only one spray tan per week.

Entered 1st beauty pageant, age 3. Completed 100th beauty paegant, age 5. Number of pageants won — 3, all in Arkansas.

What she wants to be when she grows up — age 10: Miss  America / orthodontist.

What she wants to be when she grows up — age 23: Princess

Favorite Sport Growing Up: Anything she could wear her cheerleading costume to.

Favorite Song: It’s all about me, by Chelsea Staub

Possible Cruel Nicknames She’ll Endure In School — Barbie. Prom Queen. Diva. Little Miss Perfect. Dumb Blonde. Dumber Blonde. Dumber than a sack of doornobs Blonde. 

Exerpt from High School Yearbook: OMG, do you remember the time we thought we were using hair spray and it turned out to be cooking spray. It did wonders for my highlights! Too bad you didn’t make Homecoming Queen. I know you were really depressed about it but I’m sure you’ll bounce back real soon. Maybe next year? Hey, did you get that job at Hooters? We’ll meet some really classy guys there. Love ya, TTYL.  Britney. <33

Over/under on number of hair pulling fights before 7th grade: 7.5.

Favorite Birthday or Xmas Gift, Teen Years — Modeling Lessons, from Bob’s Mail  Order School of Runway Success, headquartered in that media center, Omaha, Nebraska.

Favorite TV Show Growing Up:
 Miss America Paegents, Project Runway, My Super Sweet 16. Bought all the DVDs of Toddlers In Tiaras, including all the episodes she appeared in.

Academic Career:
Showed up for school most of the time. First runner-up Prom Queen, Winter Dance Queen, Homecoming Queen, Head Cheerleader Tryouts.

Eventual Occupation: Assistant Manager, Hooters, Bentonville, Arkansas.

(Thanks to mydaughter Sara for her invaluable assistance on this post)

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8:24pmSarah — how do you feel about the procedure today

8:24pmEmma — okay. I would have to say that I feel much more weirded out than I have felt in the past about this whole thing

8:25pmSarah — why?

8:27pmEmma — I think it’s because I view it, since its someone else’s egg, like she was impregnated by aliens or something out of a really freaky sci-fi movie/book. Just the thought of it sort of creeps me out. It’s like there’s something completely foreign in my mother’s body.

8:27pm Sarah —  i feel the same way i was just concerned that she was nervous, im afraid that she wants to back out now. too late now….

8:31pmEmma  — same. I have no idea what I would be feeling in her position. Scared maybe? Well, being me, and not our brave mom, I would be focusing on the negative aspects like the complications and things that could go wrong.

8:31pmSarah — exactly

8:34pmSarah  — I’m still shocked that she went through with this

8:35pmEmma  — Same. I totally thought she wouldn’t have gone through with it. Like I thought that after thinking it through, she would have backed out.

8:40pmEmma  — I think our lives are going to be pretty different if mom does become pregnant and the transfer takes.

8:41pmSarah  — yes yes it will

8:42pmEmma  — How so, do you think?

8:43pmSarah —  its going to be realy awkward to see mom pregnant, especailly when its not ours.

8:57pmEmma It definitely will be.


The first in what promises to be a reoccurring feature of GuestWomb where my daughters Emma and Sara get on a Facebook chat about the topic of the day. First up — Mom and her hard-to-self-administer injections.

DAD — So…Mom is having a hard time stabbing herself these days. Wot up with that? How does it make you feel? Why do you think this is happening? What can you do to help? Is it hilarious? Depressing? OK DISCUSS!!!

4:51pm Emma — OK, thats the question we gotta answer.

4:51pm Sarah — ok but did dad just say “wot up”???

4:52pm Emma — Fine, I’ll go first

4:53pm Emma — While I’m kind of annoyed with the fact she can’t do it, I’m sure it must be hard to actually stab yourself with the needle. Even though, I offer to do it for her, I get a little queasy at the thought of it.

4:54pm Sarah — Shes always so stubborn about it, like it isn’t easy but shes been doing this a million times!!

4:54pm Emma — and yes, Dad really did say that.
4:54pm Sarah — 😮

4:55pm Emma — I know. But, again, would you, honestly, be able to do it?

4:55 pm Sarah — I could understand the first time being scared about injecting yourself, but shes just being ridiculous about it. After doing it 20 times i think I’d be okay with it.

She said it didn’t hurt. Then whats wrong with her?!??!

4:57 pm Emma — Exactly. I think once you’ve done it a few times, you’d think you’d be fine with injecting yourself another 20 times!

4:57 pm Sarah — I still think its disgusting

5:01 pm Emma — Me too. But it’s not like she can get a nurse to do it. I mean, she could, but she’d either have to drive all the way out to a doctor’s office or pay one to come over. She has Sue but thats for a different shot and she’s Mom’s friend.

5:02 pm Sarah — true

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sarablog

Back when I played golf, I always felt like I got my money’s worth out a round. Not because of any athletic achievement or the thrill of competition. In fact it was my very un-Tiger like ways that gave me this sense of satisfaction.

I got plenty of swings in to be sure. And that gave me the opportunity to see almost every square inch area of the course. The trees and forests. Deep sand traps. Lots of tall grass and brush. And occassionally those flat areas where the grass is really short.

And that’s a good way to introduce our second daughter, Sara. Because she’s playing through life the way I play golf. Left and right. Up and down. Trying out every thing she can from every position or style. Moods. Ideas. Opinions. Friends. Interests.

Some times it’s hard to keep track of. Today she likes one kind of music or food; tomorrow her likes might be on the other end of the spectrum. Like they say about the weather in Hawaii, if you don’t like her attitudes or ideas about something….wait a couple of hours and you’ll find something more to your liking.

All the colors of the rainbow in one very interesting girl. Sara is our full throttle daughter. 13 going on 23. If she could, she’d pass Emma by in age. But in fact she’s benefitted by watching her older sister navigate life. Not always following the same path of course. Now that I think about it….that’s rarely the case. It’s not that she chooses to zig when Emma zags for that reason alone. I think it’s part of her need for constant stimulation.

She’s constantly learning what works and what doesn’t. Like a radar sending out signals and seeing what waves bounce back. It’s the self exploration that has helped develop some of her most remarkable traits. Her deep sense of empathy. Her single minded work ethic. And what I love most — the blazing bright spark of life that she brings to our home. Like a shooting star flaring across our lives.

So here are Sara’s first reactions to this big idea:

When my mom first told me that she would be a surrogate carrier I was confused. I didn’t know what surrogacy meant. It sounded strange.

After being told what it all means, I first thought that we would be the ones who would keep the baby. I was excited about it….but then I learned the whold story. I know that my mom will be holding the baby, not keeping it.

The idea of the whole surrogacy is weird to me. My mom and I have always wanted another child so I wouldn’t be the baby of the family anymore. She thought instead of keeping the baby; let’s give it to someone else. The baby would belong to someone else, so we wouldn’t be related at all.

I think that my mom is being very selfless by doing this surrogacy. We met the surrogate parents, and we loved them. They were great parents with 4 kids already.